Deja vu - REPINEdotNET v13

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i want to get back into writing. the only problem with that is that i never know what I want to write about... i'm more or less lacking inspiration, or maybe it's just motivation. i don't know. whatever it is, i want to get out of the rut in my life, and i think writing will greatly help it. web design as well.

i really do miss repine for what it was. i miss the people. i miss the writing. i miss the reading. i miss the community that it fostered, both with the regular contributors that did just that - contribute, and with the hostees, who had their own websites utilizing repine's host space that also contributed to the daily bustle on occasion.

i think i'm going to start using pictures from deviantART as inspiration. i may also start just taking my laptop around town, plug it in somewhere and start writing. why not just take a pen and notepad, you ask? i don't do well with paper. i can't write nearly as fast as i think, so i end up thinking too much and getting too far ahead of myself to finish the sentence that my hand stopped scribing mid-word. i can type my thoughts out a lot more quickly, nearly as quickly as i think in fact, so it's much easier to establish a flow and keep it going.

i know i always say i don't regret anything in life, because i feel that every moment passed contributes to what makes a person who they are in every moment now. while this is true for most things, i've come to the realization lately that there are, in fact, some things i regret in life. oddly enough, some of them would have never even had the opportunity to become regrets had another taken a different path.

for example, i regret not pursuing things with A. i do think we really did genuinely love eachother, but the physical distance between us and the events going on in our lives got the better of us - or at least me. i'm still not sure why i ever gave up on that. however, had i pursued things with H (which, by the way, was an extremely similar situation at the time of seperation, generally speaking), then the relationship with A would never have developed as much as it had. i'm sure i'd still have been friends with A, but that would have been the extent, which wouldn't have been far enough to regret letting her go.

there are other regrets i have in my life as well, but i won't go into those just yet. i just needed to get some thoughts out. i'd say good night at this time, but i can't sleep at all the last couple days. it's early morning now, anyways. have a good day, whoever it is that reads this.
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